Good Vibrations

Two weeks’ continuous service cemented my suspicions, namely that adopting a shorter stem and moustache bars would transform comfort and handling in most contexts. Sharper steering keeps things the right sort of interesting, without becoming a handful when haring along hairpin descents with beloved Revolution Cargo full to its thirty five kilo brim.

Spotted another one tethered to an equally hard working GT (note Magura HS33 raceline brakeset) while on a quick supermarket mission this week. Thought the shot would come in handy for book and related projects that are on the cusp of fruition.

Back to those Mungo then…Loftier backswept contours improve one’s view of conditions ahead, yet still affording commendable relief from headwinds and other biblical stuff.

Conversely, they do place more weight on the ulnar region, low-level vibration becoming intrusive after two hours or so, provoking me to explore some additional insulation. 

I’ve reviewed countless commercial “underlays” in recent years and in fairness, most seem to work, though some are definitely better than others.Binding redundant butyl inner tube around the bars before dressing them is another useful (not to mention, thrifty) homely remedy. Ah, but disturbing the several times repatriated Cinelli and asking it’s weathered adhesive to bond convincingly with butyl was pushing our luck somewhat. 

Hence I’ve adopted a popular Audax trick, leaving it in situ and weaving that crisp, white Lizard Skins DSP strategically atop. Thrice mummified around the curves, it appears to optimise protection with a slightly funky, as distinct from frumpy aesthetic.

Contact points are by definition exceedingly personal and something I’m predisposed to tinkering with. Superficially I wasn’t remotely “taken” by this SR Becoz moderate men’s saddle-183mm at its widest point-forty millimetres wider than “ideal” for my sit bones. However, such dogma breeds its own kinds of myopia. Less aggressive configurations influence rider spine angle, in turn placing proportionately greater weight upon the saddle.

This would explain why Spa cycle’s buxom (168mm) B17 homage proved so compatible.  The Becoz is literally bursting with cutting edge, recycled/organic technologies. Steep, relatively tall steel rails won’t set anyone’s Lycra ablaze but are extremely well finished and those additional millimetres seem to have corrected a minor imperfection height-wise.

These are coupled to a clever set of supple, yet progressive elastomers absorbing minor road/trail buzz while the internal blend of polyurethane gel combine ample support without hindering tour-typical 85-100rpm cadences. Covers used to be a weak spot, particularly on the goo-filled breed where they could rupture during a spill (especially off road) leaving sticky, oozy remnants spattered across one’s finest Lycra.

Selle Royal has continued the unusual, ecologically friendly theme here too, fortifying the slightly rubberised texture with sustainably cultivated conifer wood flour. This latter ingredient seems to counteract irksome surfing, though has caused some thinner, super shiny Lycra to gather uncomfortably during the course of a ride and demands physically lifting (rather than shuffling) one’s derriere fore/aft.

On the flip side, it’s a boon when leaning back against the saddle, maintaining traction when negotiating long descents/looser surfaces. Curiously, the (164mm) athletic version only comes in male centric dimensions and on balance might’ve been optimal for said build. However, this experience serves to illustrate that not everything can be reduced to a series of formulas/calculations.

A recent spate of burglaries in this otherwise peaceful locale’ is a poignant reminder to review and bolster security. This needn’t involve colonies of CCTV but assessing things as a professional or opportunist thief might enables one to close certain avenues of potential attack.  

On some levels it’s ironic (given the prevalence of “community spirited curtain twitching”) that people’s behaviours are scrutinised with such intensity, yet these voyeurs mysteriously see and hear nothing during attempted/burglaries. (Don’t get me started on the omnipresent crescendo of barking dogs).

Naturally, these violations are met with eloquent choruses to the effect of “aint it awful”. Fear not, a neighbourhood watch group is coming into force, though again, I fear this says more about certain folks’ love of spearheading committees rather than pragmatic purpose.

Since time in memorial bikes have been thief magnets. I regularly introduce layers of complication be it a gamekeeper or upgraded/additional locking that will certainly slow their progress and hopefully deter. Simple measures like closing gates increases risks of thieves being seen/ heard/ disturbed, ditto laying pea-gravel/shingle or planting prickly foliage/trellis at strategic points.

Gates with solid centre panels might keep prying eyes out; though also provide those with low morals to "work" uninterrupted on the other side...

Datatag and similar hi-tech systems are another useful tool, though more in a stolen/recovered context. Slipping a piece of laminated card with name, date of birth, blood type and address inside handlebars and other contact points costs nothing-can be invaluable in this and accident contexts.

Dropping down to Dovercourt

Easter was once a time when folk would heed the call to Church, feasting and prayer. Now, the masses descend upon DIY stores in their millions, partaking in an orgy of frenzied bodging-whether painting the spare room, erecting pagodas, paths and patios or attempting full-on domestic re-wires. Accident/Emergency receptions brim with hapless heroes, who’ve discovered the human body is a mightily efficient conductor of electricity, dropped paving slabs on their sneakered feet or nailed themselves to the flat pack furniture they were trying so desperately to erect. Joshua and I took the opportunity to drop by on Justin Burls and take a sneak peak at those lovely fillet brazed prototype framesets I mentioned a while back. Both are fashioned from a lovely Columbus tubeset topped off in either electric blue or rich, ruby red. Construction is, as might be expected, flawless-evidenced by this road fixer chassis finished in a clear lacquer topcoat, that will no doubt catch on amongst the fixer fashionista. Timing (Justin had just returned from the Bespoke Bristol show) and the weather conspired against a preliminary spin but for now I’ll tease you with a few photos….
My own fleet continues to evolve, courtesy the Ilpompino's new S-Link chain and a very swish locking seatpost collar for the Univega. Now, the latter are built to order from aerospace grade titanium by Atomic 22- a small-scale manufacturer based in Horsham, West Sussex. This kit is unique, not only in terms of materials but in that they can produce locking fasteners for pretty much every component on your bike, whether road, fixed or mountain bike, brifters, brake mounts, pedals, derailleurs, crank bolts, you name it, they can protect it. Fitting is best performed using a good quality torque wrench and 8mm socket but a ring spanner will also do the trick, since most of us don’t pop torque wrenches in with the patch kit when heading out for a quick twenty-mile blast.
Early impressions are good, although I’ve had an attack of the vapours on several occasions, trying desperately to reclaim the tiny unique key from beneath the fridge/freezer. Obviously replacements are available (£30 each) and much easier to obtain since keys are automatically registered to the rightful owner at the time of order. Presently, they’re looking to employ alternative metals without compromising strength, thus lowering the cost and broadening appeal. However, it’s no substitute for a decent lock, insurance and similarly sensible precautions since a truly frustrated Neanderthal could wrap your pride and joy around some street furniture…

Theft, particularly of metals and central heating fuels is becoming endemic and almost normalised by the present economic climate but I find these rationale's a very convenient justification for wantonly criminal behaviour. A friend’s storage barn was recently ransacked of copper piping and similar raw materials associated with his plumbing and heating business. Subsequently, he spent a day making effective repair and relocating a project car and essential tooling for fear of subsequent visitation. A happier re-homing came for my faithful Specialized Air Tool track pump; this now resides with my mother and her partner’s bikes. I had a choice of two replacements, including this super sturdy twin barrel Zefal, albeit with defunct pressure gauge.
Back in the saddle and there’s been lots to play with. That BBB chain and cassette seem to be wonderful bedfellows with the Univega’s a’la Carte drivetrain, not so much as missing a shift in four hundred miles. Quality of electroplating appears equally impressive and the factory marinade tenacious for the first two hundred but I’ve since reverted to a wax based dressing. Then came these aptly named Knog Blinder, which belt out a whopping eighty and forty-four lumens respectively. Gone is the iconic medical silicone in favour of anodised aluminium faces and a choice of five funky lighting patterns.
We’ve got the standard “dice” but noughts; crosses, stripes and arrows are the alternatives. Tipping the scales at thirty-five grams a piece, they’re hardly going to cramp the style of even the sleekest of road/fixers either. Performance seems generally impressive, visible in the "bobby-dodger" see-by sense to around 750 metres and rechargeable run times between two hours fifty three and 78.47 hours in top and eco-flash settings respectively. Overall, aside from the slightly swanky price tag, I’m genuinely very impressed and the quality has been tweaked a notch or so higher than the otherwise loveable silicone types too…Back to the book…




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Red Light District

This latest clutch of LEDs signals autumn and winter’s steady advance; the lighting market being one of the fiercest fought battlegrounds, which is great news for the likes of you and I. The trend is toward high output commuter models that hop aboard the computer’s USB port for a few hour’s charge-perfect for desk jockeys but inappropriate for touring and mile munching Audax where dynamos and double A batteries rule the roost. Light & Motion’s Vis 180 is one such beast, shrouding the rider (and companion) in a cloak of retina reddening thirty-five lumens and one hundred and eighty degrees visibility. At the other end of the spectrum, RSP’s Tourlite has made an equally favourable impression. Tipping the scales at 120g it mounts to rear carriers-at the time of comment, they’re still refining the bracket so I attached ours to my common or garden 6061 Topeak courtesy of a Bor Yeuh saddle rail mounted bottle cage caddy. Output is good for three quarters of a mile and we’re talking in terms of ninety hours from a set of double A in flashing mode. It’s genuinely waterproof passing my hosepipe torture test with flying colours and gives change from £20-perfect for town hacks, tourers and other packhorses. Now, sticking with the darker months and pardoning the arguably unforgivable pun, these clever reflective dots from the Lightweight’s range are a great tertiary source of illumination if day glow’s not really your bag. Available in a choice of eight colours they’re basically self-adhesive stickers impregnated with tiny 3M dots, reflecting the chosen colour when graced by vehicle and street lighting. Weighing around 20g per pack they adhere to most surfaces and will hide unsightly chips and scratches. I chose the Univega’s mudguards (fenders) as my canvas and thus far I’m impressed by their performance. There’s also versions intended for clothing and helmets claiming visibility from 500 metres… So to the Holdsworth… After several twists and turns, further consultation with Paul Vincent suggests as the shell is otherwise undamaged, running some brass into the hairline fracture and sanding it flat should prove the least invasive, most cost-effective solution. However, this will undoubtedly necessitate a re-spray so a couple of bottle mounts will complete the structural surgery before it passes through to Maldon Shot Blasting & Powder Coating for a fresh shot of 5012. Estimated cost £95 including paint and transportation. Putting this into context, a new 531bottom bracket shell, bottle bosses and re-spray crosses the £150 threshold. Arguably economic given the prices of replica framesets but considerably more hassle. Assuming said surgery cuts mustard in the long term, I’ll have the vinyl lettering made and maybe a set for the Teenage dream too…

Monies saved will be ploughed into my other projects-specifically recognised qualifications in massage therapies-something I’ve been eager to acquire for a couple of years. Two local colleges of further and higher education run the required courses but enrolment will hinge on the economics of supply and demand.
"Get on your bike and look for work" was the famous mantra chorused by right of centre politicians some thirty years ago in response to the last bout of chronic social and economic tensions. However, Suffolk constabulary have taken this literally, in a scheme bound to induce rage in anyone unfortunate enough to have his or her bike(s) stolen. Any stolen- recovered bikes within the county are to be distributed amongst ex offenders in order they can “look for work”. So taken to its logical conclusion Terry and Theresa tea leaf can steal your machine, sell it on and potentially get it back, profiting two fold from the rightful owner’s misery! Suggesting hard-core or persistent offenders can “go straight” in this context is laughable and shows a marked ignorance of the penal system’s inherent failures. First and foremost this can only encourage more prolific episodes of theft…

Secondly, the prison system creates a revolving door for many (predominantly young men) whom in due course learn to be more efficient and dangerous criminals. Upon leaving prison there resumes the cycle of criminality-a lack of education, life opportunity and cohesive social network means they only know other ex/offenders. Couple this with addiction and related compulsions, it becomes prohibitively difficult to reintegrate within civil society Ending on a sweeter note we have Finish Line’s one step clean and lube spray-the cycling equivalent of two in one shampoo and conditioner. Simply spray on a filthy chain (and/or cassette for those who admitting to owning machines with variable derailleur transmissions). Leave for a minute and the solvent dissolves congealed lube, grit and general contaminant.

Running the chain through a clean, lint free rag purges any remnants, leaving behind a surprisingly tenacious dry lube. It works a treat on slotted cables, step-in pedal mechanisms leaving them super slick. Results of real world testing over the past few weeks are favourable, requiring reapplication once despite heavy showers and waterlogged roads. However, winter may hum a very different tune and demand weekly top-ups. The mixture’s pretty potent in aerosol form so apply in well-ventilated areas and take the usual precautions, storing safely away from children and pets.