Charge of the Light Brigade

Reputedly a creature of the night, lighting is an evergreen subject, not restricted to the depths of winter. Generally speaking I'm really taken by the convenience of systems feeding from USB ports-an indisputable boon for desk jockeys, although docking space at my PC tower is too scarce to mention. Watching the dog-walking Li-on unit charging from the kitchen socket, it suddenly occurred the adaptor should be a universal fit and hey presto, the Vis 360 now guzzles straight from the mains!

There's something deeply satisfying about generating your own power and lighting is a logical extension. Chance acquisition of a mid range Rigida Snyper rim looked the consummate partner to this 105 grade dynohub. Presently bereft of wheel jig and stainless spokes of the corresponding length, I have entrusted the build to Alan at Riverside Cycle Centre. Let's be clear, aside from crazed lacquer there was nothing wrong with the venerable nexus unit. Nexus was a fabulous commuter groupset capable of lasting many years with some basic TLC. Unfortunately, it tended to be run into the ground and criticised contemptuously for expiring!

Identifying an inexpensive, yet adequately powerful lamp as replacement for the spontaneously combusting Basta has proved difficult, although this model from RSP looks very promising. Unlike old-fashioned Sturmey Archer and the super smooth Schmidt units, Shimano cannot be turned off which means minor perpetual drag but installing an intelligent switch that engages come the onset of darkness will hopefully maximise bulb longevity.

Speaking of intelligent systems, these Uvex Sphere glasses are fantastic across the board and suitably stylish sans bike too. They're made from Makrolon, a sophisticated polycarbonate employed because of it's impact/temperature resistance coupled with absolute optical clarity. The latter is hard to quantify and takes several longish rides to fully appreciate but its superiority "litemirror" technology works to the same principles as automatic welder's darkshields, ensuring perfect tone and contrast.

Elsewhere, our home brew citrus bike wash has developed a hiccup, well mould to be precise so I need to introduce an inexpensive, natural preserve to the blend. Mercifully there's still plenty of commercial prep in the garage for now... Just as well seeing Joshua has disconnected himself from the dubious delights of his Nintendo and taken to thundering along the lanes at an impressive thirteen mph. Amazing what a handlebar mounted computer and new helmet can inspire!

Lubes, Lotions & Love Potions

Steady (as distinct from miraculous) recovery from sabre-tooth man-flu coincided with the arrival of these three lubes from White Lightning best described as diet, regular and over proof! The clean ride goes on wet before turning to a milky white paste, shedding accumulated dirt, grunge and grime and can be reapplied with the minimum of fuss without recourse to solvents and chain baths. An obvious favourite for those lazy, hazy days of summer, it's just the ticket for derailluer driven cross and winter workhorses with top-ups around the eighty mile mark.

Their Epic ride formula is something of a curiosity trying to marry the best of both wet and dry worlds in a semi synthetic blend that doesn't attract dirt and reapplied without recourse to extensive wiping and/or solvent baths. Great for mile munching Audax riders, the four ounce sample slips effortlessly inside jersey pockets, wedge/saddle bags/ panniers. Early indicators suggest these non-toxic base oils and petroleum distillates meet their objectives but require copious rag and a steady hand to prevent considerable wastage.

Nigh on thermonuclear protection comes courtesy of Wet-Ride extreme which, taken at face value could be the river rider's wet dream. Super economical to apply, it doubles as a nifty grease substitute for cleats, threaded components/ fasteners/locking mechanism while remaining steadfast and true over high mileages in salty, coastal climes. Control cables and pivot points call for something lighter but foul weather fixed/single-speed pilots and end-to end checkpoint charlies won't be disappointed.

Having mastered production of corrosion inhibitors, a wet, miserable Saturday afternoon prompted my first batch of citrus based, paint friendly bike wash. First impressions weren't so favourable- impotent even, but adding some freshly squeezed orange to the mixture saw it devouring acres of congealed mud. Three minutes and a warm-water rinse later, Joshua's Raleigh was literally squeaky clean!

The expression " Cheap as chips" couldn't be more apt when describing the tumbling prices of electronic technology. Only a few years back, twelve function wireless computers would've commanded the lion's share of £35. In 2011, this pair of Veloset units give change from £25! Chinese made to a pleasing and extremely user-friendly standard, the cheaper 212 seen on Joshua's bike incorporates a really useful back light and large easy-to-read display. Adequate weather seals are readily improved with a customary lick of petroleum jelly on the electrical/battery contacts and a placing a thin freezer bag atop the head unit should be sufficient to counteract all but the most torrential downpours. Common to the sharper styled and better sealed 213 adorning the Univega's cockpit, it boasts a thermometer, although the jury's out as to whether this is genuinely useful-aside from the obvious group-ride bragging rights.

By contrast, these Altura kids gloves weren't so inexpensive. Weatherproof, three layer construction, rubberised non-slip palms and fingers, thunsulate linings make for the perfect technical glove whether cruising through the lanes together on the tag-along or indulging in those rites of passage snowball fights... Alas they've been mislain- more accurately one is thought to be lonesome in his school drawer. Oh the folly of youth and the joys of parenthood!

Cometh The New Year, Cometh The Man-Flu

Quite a bit has drizzled my way these past few days, from this T-shirt gifted me by Richard at Urban Hunter, some Sugru silicone putty and Guy Andrews' " The Custom Road Bike". Alas, with notable exception, riding has been somewhat limited to the virtual kind thanks to the sudden and deeply debilitating onset of sabre-tooth man-flu. Us don't work, don't eat contract types tend to be fairly stoical so I'm pleased to report nominal impact upon features/copy/photography. After a few months' break, Joshua has resurrected his passion for cycling, taking the trail by storm while demonstrating maturity and confidence beyond his years on public roads. Children outgrow their wardrobes with alarming regularity so these Altura Cruiser Winter tights have replaced his season-too-short Polaris. Made from a rugged fleece-lined polyester; these winter versions incorporate a water-repellent (shower proof) coating for comfort and practicality while a looser cut transcends road, mtb and touring genres nicely. Sensibly positioned Scotchlite detailing provides welcome nocturnal visibility-especially at higher cadences and young protege's find stirrups easier to negotiate than zippered ankles.
Early impressions of this Sugru silicone putty seem favourable, effecting good repair/modification of light brackets and similar lightweight resin accessories. Conceived by Jane, it's basically soft touch rubber reckoned to mould and set permanently with/to aluminium, steel, ceramics, glass, wood and some fabrics/plastics...Not simply "Make do and mend" making a fashionable return in these times of austerity but a creative tool powerful enough to improve existing products.
With this in mind, I've been creating some DIY "cable cuffs" to prevent unsightly and damaging abrasion where outers make contact with the frameset. Claimed operating temperatures between minus 60 and plus 180 degrees suggest a wealth of applications around the workshop. Run around the seat-collar it could provide as weather-tight seal for bikes run in all weathers without mudguards (fenders) thus preventing water, salt and ingress channelling inside the seat-tube.

Peeling open the packaging reveals twelve complimentary/contrasting colour sachets containing the goo. Make sure your desired surface is free of the usual contaminant (dirt, dust, grease etc) before moulding the soft putty around the surface(s) and allowing twenty four hours curing at room temperature. Other possibilities include the semi permanent fitment of cable guides and other low-stress applications. However, don't be telling me tall tales of reuniting broken frame tubes by the roadside...For that you'll need a welder and a wealth of skill.

Transferable skills and plenty of 'em are the way to successfully weather economic nose-dives. MIG (Metal inert Gas, or more accurately Gas Metal Arc Welding seeing as oxygen isn't an inert substance) wouldn't be my tool of choice for constructing lightweight bicycle frames as the temperature is less controllable than oxyacetylene, inviting premature fatigue or simply blowing gaping holes in thin tubing. That said, I've seen some very fetching framesets built this way using off-cuts and leftover paint. Crudely, MIG is a semi automatic process-if you can draw a straight line using a marker pen, then you're capable of producing passable welds with a bit of practice and basic tuition.

The real skill lies in metal preparation- clean, well-mitred joins, dexterity and a decent quality weld unit. The difference between cheap and expensive models is ease of use- on the lowest settings, I have been able to fashion prototype touring trailer chassis from basic grade Columbus tubes with a 140amp semi pro model. Seasoned coach builders and similarly skilled metal workers might achieve the same results using a more rudimentary 110amp unit but it's a lot harder and frankly, we always reach for the tools nicest to use.

Devised for use in WWII munitions factories, the process quickly won favour within manufacturing and later, auto-repair shops thanks to it's ease and speed of use-especially on relatively thin car panels. It's possible to build all manner of nice things from scrap steels-work/storage stands, racks, chairs etc. Many motorcycle frames are constructed this way too...

Ten years on from my early prototypes, I am looking at returning to trailer design on a hobby/cottage industry basis. This time from electrician's conjugate which is of comparable weight to basic Cro-moly, yet so much easier to weld. As a rough and ready reckoner, conjugate is like comparing Peugeot's in-house Carbolite 103 with Reynolds 531- the former was marginally lighter, easier to mass produce but lacked the outright responsiveness and strength to weight ratio. Touring/utility trailers need good handling characteristics and while 4130 of the same weight is less likely to fail, basic hi-tensile steels can be repaired in the back of beyond by pretty much any roadside garage...

Slip Sliding Toward the New Year

While the snow has retreated, the landscape remains characterised by acres of sheet ice to the extent I haven't been able to take full advantage of the seasonal lull. Clubwo/men have been conspicuous by their absence and those braving the roads have sensibly shunned their sprightly winter steeds for more upright mtb configurations shod with two inch knobblies.

Against this picturesque, seasonal hysteria, we've been brewing more corrosion inhibiting formula from the comfort of the kitchen, taken delivery of the mighty skyscraper in-line seatpost and contemplated a new cottage industry but more about that in the New Year. Available in a kaleidoscope of sizes from 25.4 to 30.8 in .2mm increments, the aptly monikered skyscraper is phenomenally rigid and boasts a markedly superior finish to most at this end of the market. Hauling my seventy kilo mass coupled with tag-along and SQR type saddlebags failed to induce the faintest hint of whip whether swooping into descents or cantering up the climbs so it's a boon for powerfully built riders looking to take advantage of smaller compact framesets. By the same token, two hours' spirited green laning suggests it doesn't transmit shock like the proverbial pneumatic drill either, although riders of plain gauge aluminium might tell a very different tale.

Being a night owl, lights are very much my bag and while Topeak's Hi light, powered by two CR2032 watch type cells doesn't turn night into day, it's perfect for those "Out longer than I anticipated" winter afternoon excursions. Consuming nominal handlebar real-estate and delivering around 90 hours in flashing, the three ultra bright LEDs make worthy compliments to dynamo systems and won't cramp the style of ultra minimalist fixers either. Weather resistant as removed from waterproof, they benefit from a lick of Vaseline on the contacts but there's little to grumble about considering the front and rear combo gives change from £20.

The same could not be said of the emergent 2.5% hike in VAT (Value Added Tax) commencing in January which will do little to bolster consumer confidence and moreover, spending vital for sustained economic growth. Doubtless some huge corporations will absorb the blow as a sweetener for the first quarter but this remains cold comfort for small businesses and individuals. Cycling is oft dubbed a recession product but unlike thirty years ago when it faced extinction, manufacturers have responded with a wealth of innovative, practical and extremely affordable utility mounts for everyday transportation.

In the right context, this could give rise to a more intelligent, integrated transport system, similar to those employed in countries such as Denmark and the Netherlands that enjoy high standards of living and cycling as a respected, everyday mode of transport. However, such models can only evolve in accordance with the mindset and will of its citizens and sadly I'm not convinced the UK is ready to embrace this cultural shift.

Lipstick, Powder n' Paint

"Red lips, hair and finger-nails, I can tell you're a mean old Jezebel, let's go upstairs and read my tarot cards"...Ahem, well, here's the offending top-tube enamel imperfection in question- insignificant but annoying nonetheless. Much pleading with close female friends, siblings and the odd passer by for good measure drew little more than playful ridicule, so I boldly strolled through the doors of a well-known high street cosmetics chain and scanned the neatly aligned rows of nail varnish (quietly oblivious to periodic quizzical glances) until I happened upon this "New York Color". Not quite a perfect match (Metallic being notoriously tricky) but cures close enough on small areas. Univega's haven't been imported to these shores for a few years but should a genuine OEM colour stick come under my radar at the right price, I'll snap it up there and then. Maldon Shot Blasting & Powder Coating's showroom was positively awash with vibrant, beautiful colours, brightening up the prospect of another day's dull but necessary temping. This glittering pearlescent livery transforms an otherwise bargain basement mid nineties Cro-moly mtb frameset into a thing of beauty. The effect is created using a "flip" powder coat and would cost around £80/90 (including VAT and blasting dependant upon whether a lacquer coat was required). These plain-gauge tubesests aren't particularly rewarding to ride but resist dents and dings better than exotica while lateral stiffness ensures dependable laden handling-especially paired with trailers/tag-alongs.The constant lockings and unlocking take their toll on a bike's livery and while mummifying the top-tube in old inner tube certainly helps, design Maestro's Knog think they have overcome this necessary evil by introducing a range of locks encased in their trademark medical-grade silicone. Pictured is their amusingly monikered mid range Kransky which occupies their " Council Estate" security rating. Complete with "strap-on" carry bracket and tipping the scales at around the kilo mark, it isn't designed to match the outright security of ABUS Steel-O Flex and similar top-flight urban defences but it's really convenient, parking up for shorter periods in prominent areas around town, on club runs, track meets etc. So far so good but we'll see how it fairs under assault from the bike thief's typical arsenal in the coming weeks... Elsewhere, the ETC cushioned cork wrap unveiled last week might just be the perfect finishing touch for long haul tourists and mile munching Audax aficionados looking to trim costs without sacrificing comfort. Generous measures also permit the use of aftermarket MARS type shock absorbing underlays (so long as you didn't mind a slightly chunky look to your cockpit). Real world performance is equally impressive, providing excellent all conditions purchase whether screaming fully laden along wet, winding descents or simply trickling through town.Prolonged rides on and sans asphalt, in gloved or bare hands suggests cushioning rivals that of more exotic polymer blends, although December was quick to leave her calling card upon our pink sample. In fairness, tickled with a medium bristled brush dipped in warm, soapy water returned ours to its original lustre but winter, cross and other bikes in hard service are better served by the more restrained red or blue variants.

Freezing conditions coupled with a modest thaw are once again wreaking havoc upon our infrastructures. Rim ruinous potholes are opening up everywhere and in light of central government spending cuts, local authorities are struggling to cope. Cushioned by two inch rubber and mtb wheels certainly helps but I've had to swerve around a few where the asphalt has seemingly opened up in slow motion!

Persistent low-level vibration succeeded in loosening the RSP Tour light mounting hardware and the recently fitted 12-25 cassette. Both easily cured using 8/10mm wrenches and this rather nifty little tool from Cyclo. Measuring 24cm long, it consumes nominal space in saddlebag or tool board and is so much nicer to use than the traditional hexagonal types thanks to superior leverage, accurate machining and rubberised handle.

Relentless testing of the Gusset 8spd chain suggests the factory lube is one of the most tenacious I've ever come across, still clinging to the links in spite of high mileages in the present climate, although mercy came in the form of Finish line's one stop cleaner and lube to coincide with tightening of the cassette body. Regular audiences will note my sporadic search for decent quality 350/400mm posts in the increasingly obscure 26.0 diameter.

Enter our old friend serendipity and some casual conversation revealed Dutch component brand BBB still offer their aptly named "Skyscraper" in extensive and more unusual sizes (25.4 through to 27.2 in point two millimetre increments). Some may baulk at the 386g weight penalty but rigidity is of greater significance on smaller mtb/other compact geometry designs-especially those that partake in tag-along slavery. Sure, there's nothing, structural or otherwise wrong with the venerable polished and lacquered Kalloy but I've happened upon this model at a very tempting price so, seeing as it coordinates perfectly with the Univega's other finishing kit...

Snow Joke!

Snow is big news here in the UK, although to be fair, the last few winters have been quite dramatic as a result. The much promised white-out finally hit this corner of the South East on Monday night/ early hours of Tuesday morning. Frustrated by a lack of creativity and working on the basis conditions would be fine so long I took it gently; Univega and I popped out to test some kit and chase the blues away. Once we'd negotiated the lanes, main roads seemed relatively clear so I increased the tempo to 14mph monitoring every tyre rotation for sheet ice and anything else that might result in an intimate encounter with Terra firma. Deserted backwaters are always a bad bet and quickly present a false sense of security. Two and a quarter miles into our twelve mile saunter, Mother Nature reminded me of her unyielding superiority. Negotiating a slippery section, I un-clipped my left foot and was paddling through when the otherwise exemplary Schwalbe lost traction- attempts to counteract the inevitable proved futile. Miraculously, I caught the bike's fall so, completely unscathed, we continued and ultimately finished the excursion as planned. Ironic then that these Continental Nordic Spike 120 should arrive the next day. As the name suggests, these are an extreme conditions tyre designed to cope with ice, snow, sleet and slush. Available in 700c, their 42mm profiles can present compatibility hassles with more traditional 'cross, touring and hybrids while 900g a piece might seem unpalatable to some but with notable exception, they're the safest tyres for treacherous roads and indeed trails. Bearing striking resemblance to the archetypal cross country mountain bike tyre, the open tread ploughs through the snow while 120 steel studs provide the traction, biting deep into the ice beneath. Phenomenal braking and cornering prowess along with ultra dependable three-ply casings inspire confidence and speeds of around fifteen mph, although sharp acceleration-say entering a roundabout can induce momentary losses of grip. Given the level of performance, £80 for a pair is money well spent-especially those of us employed on a "Don't work, don't eat" contract basis who can ill afford time off and a crash damaged steed into the bargain. Being critical, reflective sidewalls would've been a nice touch and I'd love a 26 inch (MTB) version!
Markedly cheaper performance upgrades are these pro series cantilever pads from Jagwire that offer plenty of smiles per mile at £10 for a complete set. To my surprise, they're compatible with all rim types from polished alloy to ceramic and carbon exotica, toeing-In's a cinch and (decent cables allowing) will transform the modulation and feel of older designs (e.g. mid nineties Shimano M system) employing 7mm threaded stubs. Better still, the secret formula all-conditions compounds are cartridges so simply slip out of their shoes with the help of a two millimetre Allen key should you fancy something less generic. Whether a Christmas treat for the working bike or a stocking filler "thank you" to someone special, it's hard to see where you'd go wrong.

Reasoning a top mounted axillary lever might facilitate greater control, enhancing our centre of gravity when scrubbing off the speed in inclement conditions, I offered this rather befitting Specialized model to the bars. Ball burnished satin, black, 31.8 diameter complete with hinged clamp it was the perfect, unobtrusive cockpit compliment... However, said lever scampered back to the spares drawer once it became apparent the WTB are only over size at the bulge diameter.Inviting the tubby tourer into the kitchen for a well-earned polish presented the obvious opportunity to fit this very fetching pink wrap. (Being a test sample, you takes pot luck) but the macho boys will be relieved to hear there's a choice of several primary colours too. Teasing aside, it's remarkably generous and very compliant, winding elegantly around the most extreme drops- perfect for those Midge/ Major Taylor's. Often, less expensive wraps are let down by poor adhesives but these sit just where they're put yet remain tolerant of surreptitious unravelling. First impressions seem favourable but long, steady winter miles are key-especially when it comes to such a pale hue. Now, I'm looking for a nail varnish to match the frame's metallic red... there's this small but infuriating nick along the top tube......

Lord Of The Thighs

No sooner said than delivered... I am of course referring to a 140mm version of BBB's Razer saddle courtesy of the brands' Dutch headquarters and what a difference a few millimetres make. We've been chasing up and down the highways and byways this past week without the merest hint of discomfort or chafing. Employing the same micro-tech faux leather cover, the black variant is unsealed so feels extremely tactile but is less convenient to clean (cross aficionados and others wandering through winter sans guards take note!).Couriers bearing all manner of tasty test treats have been beating a path to my door these past ten days or so. Given the season, day glow is once again envogue but this jacket, pannier/rucksack cover and helmet from Pro Viz are particularly noteworthy-especially since £55 buys a waterproof garment with electroluminescent technology burning through the dullest days and darkest nights. Sure, being as it comprises of a simple waterproof shell and mesh liner there's some trade-off in terms of breathability and the cut while reasonably generous, is tailored for more relaxed riding positions. However, there's some lovely detailing too and it ensures the elements remain firmly outside.

Capacious side pockets keep keys, wallets and even compact cameras close to hand without impeding progress and the zippered poacher's stash is equally welcome. Fleece lined collar and adjustable cuffs complete the package, preventing wind, rain and chill billowing inside-even when the mercury hovers around zero.

Fifteen miles at nigh on race pace, the inner climate starts feeling clammy but a long way short of "Boiled in the bag". Alas, the electroluminescent technology rules out machine washing, which could turn socially awkward after a few seasons but by this juncture, it won't owe you anything and the outer can be wiped down with impunity. Rucksack/small pannier covers incorporating this technology aren't completely revolutionary- Respro's version is better equipped to resist regular encounter with brickwork, foliage and generic wear and tear.

That aside, the Pro Viz cover still represents excellent value for money, slips securely aboard rucksacks and single panniers with twenty odd litre capacities so could be the perfect Christmas stocking filler. Dressing in garments ruinous to the retina removes the SMIDSY (Sorry mate, I didn't see you) defence but contrary to popular misconception, has little practical effect upon driver etiquette. Recent outings in various attire suggests cars approach faster, overtaking riders sporting helmets and/or day glow with greater indifference. More tangible research reveals a marked tendency for "enthusiast" cyclists and motorcyclists to be targeted for abuse/wantonly dangerous behaviours by a small minority of drivers. Richard Ballantine's 1988 edition of his justly revered "Bicycle Book" indulges in some over simplistic pop-sociology when categorising drivers and their vehicles but anecdotally, there seems a grain or two of truth amongst his sweeping assertions. December the 16th marks the ninth anniversary of a hit and run involving myself and a red three series BMW along Streatham High Rd. Mercifully I escaped with little more than cuts, grazes, scuffed bar wrap and a bent mech hanger. Socio-economically deprived neighbourhoods are a bad bet at anytime and while reporting the incident with police out of principle, the legal process seems impotent when it comes to bringing unlicensed, uninsured and dare I suggest, contemptuous drivers to account.Adding some virility to commuter lighting comes Nite Rider's Minewt 150 cordless. Boasting 150 lumens, integral Li-on mains/USB chargeable cell, impressive performance coupled with nominal clutter means its perfect for fastidious fixers and tidy winter trainers. Output has me really excited; it's the first commuter derived lamp that brings country lanes alive, albeit in the highest setting. Medium is good but better suited to the suburban scramble whereas low is strictly for urban riding and flashing for overcast mornings/emergencies.

A combined switch/battery life indicator flashes when charge dwindles to 15%, typically providing thirty minutes grace before complete shut down, Used in tandem with the helmet mounted models mentioned in my last entry, navigating unlit rural backwaters and midnight green laning has been absolute joy. However, its 250 sibling is the one to go for if spirited nocturnal single track mountain biking/cross fun is your thing. Weather resistance seems equal to more traditional types so long as the charge flap is fully home and more extreme river riding is avoided.

Now to purge the Univega of salt, slime and generic winter road-grime.