Sorting Shot Bearings

Amid the chaos of wholly unnecessary central heating oil tank replacement (resultant from a neighbour’s vitriolic refusal to accept two independent, qualified reports that the old unit was completely sound and fit for purpose); one's freelance canoe has been paddled with renewed vigour and seemingly positive results. Aside from the usual projects/collaborations, I’ve been weaving through the web's many strands of opportunity, albeit slightly undecided about some.

Anything with the “homeworking” tag targeted specifically at women sets my senses on red alert. For decades this was a euphemism for sweated, piece rate labour that often cost participants more money to acquire the raw materials than they actually made-£5 per thousand envelopes being one of the most commonly advertised lures that springs to mind. 

This appears to have crossed into creative, skilled vocations in recent years- $5 for 1,000 word feature ring any bells among fellow freelancers? Frankly, anyone foolish enough to plunder these depths i.e. willingly compete in such races to the bottom will find precious little sympathy from this corner.  

While shifting half a tonne of new central heating receptacle through the side gate and to its newly set concrete plinth, “Uncle” Benny happened to mention one of his bike’s fit n’ forget square taper bottom brackets had finally turned sloppy, so I agreed to supply and fit a cheap but fairly cheerful Shimano replacement. In this instance we settled upon the Japanese giant's basic UN26 complete with composite sleeves and solid steel axle-£7 inc postage. Removing the resident "Power pro" unit proved less taxing than I thought given a brief blast of penetrant spray inside the seat tube and using sheer leverage from Lezyne's CNC rod.

Despite giving the incoming unit’s threaded sections a liberal slathering of ceramic polymer grease and using precision tooling, these components are decidedly soft and very easily stripped-overcome by applying gentle pulses of super invasive penetrant spray while surreptitiously winding it fully home in gentle bursts.   

No sooner had we everything reinstated and double checked, it became apparent that his entry level road bike’s unit had succumbed to the same fate despite only a handful of rides! Given our experience with the UN26, he’s requested I supply and fit the UN55, whose superior bearings, seals and hollow axle should amass much higher mileages before singing that familiar swansong.

Staying with square tapers, this rather fetching System EX crankset has replaced the cheap but decidedly charming Stronglight ST55. 44 teeth maintain the road sensible 77 inch gearing, eliminating risk of spinning out on the flat or straining on moderate climbs.46/48t are the preserve of track or pancake flat TTs, though supply of 130 BCD fare is reasonable should wear or whim dictate.

At a glance 669g is fairly beefy-less than some super stiff hot forged track models but in keeping with other sub £60 fare and 170mm arms will suit production fixers, conversions or indeed some single/hub gear builds with lower bottom bracket heights since there’s less risk of grounding out when cornering hard.  

Mirror polished finishes are vastly superior to paint and this one should resist the salt monster’s advances for several seasons-longer fed periodic helpings of decent quality polymer car polish. In common with others in this class , detailing's a little workman-like around the inner spider but this isn’t glaringly obvious/likely to prove a deal breaker on trainers/club builds. 

Initial impressions are extremely favourable with excellent power transfer and nominal whip under sprinting or climbing efforts. However, we’re only 50 in to a 300mile plus evaluation for a new consumer focused title, so said remarks must be regarded as formative at this stage.

Rummaging through my spares drawer resurrected these low-profile, dual-sided shop branded Ritchey WCS homages for more convenient getaways and further improved ground clearance.They’re actually rather well made by FTP-another Taiwanese marque, boasting nicely machined, powder coated aluminium bodies, super reliable Cro-moly axles turning on remarkably smooth cartridge bearings. 

Ironically (and this seems true of other patterns) while perfectly accommodating of genuine Shimano cleats, they seem happiest with VP, Wellgo, Btwin and indeed Exustar! On that note, I’m off to pedal my wares and invest further energies into matters marketing/promotional.         

  

Time Travelling

Having headed to London’s High Holborn this week for a meeting with fellow collaborators, I arrived to find our rendezvous closed and my bladder on the brink of explosion. With no public conveniences in sight, lateral thought had me scanning for back alleys and similar points of discrete, dignified urination. An abundance of CCTV persuaded me otherwise and to seek the guidance of a policeman on horseback, who it transpired was Dutch and unfamiliar with this particular locale’…

Taking a few shots of parked fixers in attempt to distract myself from this most pressing matter, an oasis appeared in the guise of a green site toilet stationed but two metres from a derelict office block. Keeping a watchful eye for site foremen and others who might thwart said mission, I hopped the barrier and tried its door. Words cannot do justice to the euphoric relief that followed and I returned to find the Princess Louise open and my colleagues there to welcome me.

Unlike many older London pubs, this one is an immaculately preserved homage to the late 1960s, right down to the toilets’ glazed tiles, stained glass doors and sparkling porcelain facilities. Two hours hence, business concluded and action plans established, we arranged to reconvene with progress updates in two weeks before heading in our respective directions. Temptation was to make the very most of my travel card and document derelict/abandoned buildings but I’d only my compact camera to hand and forging ahead with our venture was time better spent.

Continuing the urban theme, Foffa’s minimalist hub geared build has been inducing plenty of cheer. Seven evenly spaced ratios (245% efficiency) easily trump old fashioned ten speed derailleur set-ups delivering sufficient clout in moderate conditions whether hammering full pelt into rural descents or navigating stop-start town centre traffic with a trailer en-tow. Admittedly, its loftier Alfine cousin boasts 307% efficiency and roller clutches, thus my choice for longer excursions and more challenging terrain.

That said; less glamorous components remain better bets for daily drivers that can spend several hours shackled to street furniture. Talking of which, thus far, the wet spray enamel is holding up very nicely, though were it my machine, I’d be inclined toward mummifying its top tube under offcuts of old butyl to prevent accidental damage. Going to see what the next three weeks, three hundred miles service reveal before forming any absolute conclusions though.

     

Elsewhere, those Keo pattern Wellgo R096B remain likeable contact points. On the one hand this shouldn’t come as much of a surprise given the Taiwanese giant makes pedals for a wealth of other marques but build quality seems a notch or so higher than some famous names’ entry level offerings.

Despite prolific dis/engagement in slow moving rush hour traffic, the R096’s painted aluminium bodies remain unblemished, save for some trace swirling. Contrary to popular misconception, when properly applied, powder coating doesn’t flake or peel but aluminium alloy can be chemically stripped and left bare to coincide with annual servicing unlike magnesium exotica, which much prefers paint. 

B in this instance denotes sealed needle roller, as distinct from ball bearings. Lore suggests these can be left to their own devices, though ours benefitted from being striped and repacked with White lightning’s “Crystal” grease. Some infer bearing life is rather shorter than several premium brands-not my experience having run various models on and sans asphalt for a decade or so but then powerfully built 90 kilo riders and/or those unable to resist jet washing should bear this in mind.

Cleat life seems on par with other Keo patterns and red (9.5 degree float) come supplied, although seasoned types with stronger joints may want to skip straight to grey. Either way, consumables are cheap, plentiful and easily acquired. Composite bodied Look models can be found floating around in cyberspace at ludicrously tempting price. I’ve used them to good effect in these contexts but nasty tumbles can spell their end.

     

Holdsworth...The Photo Love-Story Concludes

Having meandered back from the midlands, I spent two days contemplating life, the universe and subsequent moves from the Ilpompino’s recently moulded leather perch. Persistent, near vertical climbs also had me pondering the wisdom of an 81 inch gear. Hardly certifiable but something between 72 and 76 is nearer the mark for tarmac, 63 sans asphalt-not that I’ve taken this route on said beast for several years.

Sharing obvious similarities with IRO’s now seemingly defunct “Rob Roy”; describing these as “cross mounts with track ends” is a bit over simplistic, since their loftier centres of gravity require nimbler reflexes through more technical sections compared with a standard, geared mount. Not that plummeting temperatures haven’t presented their own challenges, potholes breeding at an alarming rate and many lanes under a thick, frosty blanket, dotted with black ice.

Fixed is ideal for these contexts, since it allows the rider to hold off against the cranks, slowing the rear wheel by very subtle increments, especially in situations where engaging one’s front brake would induce a skid and subsequent painful face-plant or broken collar bone. 

Muc-off’s CF3 dry lube continues to impress with its serene tenacity and relative cleanliness, making wheel swaps and puncture purging less socially awkward. Miles per application remains a consistent 175, even through soggy stuff, although enduro’s old guard are better served by wet ceramics and cleat mechanisms seem happier with heavy-duty Teflon/PTFE sprays.

Back in the comfort of my kitchen with warmth, running water and hot beverages in seamless supply, I commenced the final stages of the Holdsworth’s reincarnation. Contrary and unpredictable aren’t adjectives usually applied to yours truly but once again, the script changed on account of the front Halo hoop’s powder coated sidewalls being inappropriate braking surfaces.

Six layers of budget electrical tape later those Miche Xpress were dressed in 23mm Specialized rubber, axles treated to a precautionary lick of crystal grease to prevent unnecessary chafing of frame ends. Diagnostics and planning complete, even the most minimal builds can present unexpected challenges. Exit stage left my trusty workshop chain splitter, choosing this crucial moment to shoot its drive pin uselessly across the tiled floor and into oblivion!

Luckily, my Axiom compact multi tool exceeded all expectations, joining ends in matrimony with incredible finesse, leaving me to drizzle some CF3 dry into its parched links before taking right magnesium Keo homage in hand and cranking things over. Awestruck at the transmissions’ refinement, I repeated this several times before introducing a quick squirt of heavy duty Teflon prep to cleat and dual pivot brake mechanisms. Cable pruning complete, I sealed its end with superglue and tweaked Tri-Bars for more ergonomic effect.

Earlier foraging unearthed this colour coordinated, albeit elementary KNOG NERD computer and pattern spoke magnet. The head unit was calibrated to 700x35, demanding twenty minutes and an online memory jog. Ordinarily, chain tugs are derigueur, the fixed equivalent of cuff-links but these otherwise exquisite NJS stamped MKS offerings were redundant since chain length dictated the wheel slotted fully home. Project complete, he can resume hibernation until spring, leaving me to focus on commissions, deadlines and related matters. 

Home-brew kits are evocative of 1970’s middle-aged suburban men with dubious taste in jumpers and facial hair. Ironic then that one’s sibling felt this nostalgic staple a fitting yuletide gift.  Recalling one or two unfortunate, shag pile ruining detonations (induced, we think by over-zealous mixing/fermentation misadventure) I commenced proceedings from the safety of my bath tub, observing measures with religious precision. 

Decanting everything sequentially, stirring as instructed, I resumed interludes of pronounced creativity/inspiration. This serenity was rudely interrupted two hours hence by a sudden, unnerving hiss. Dashing to the bathroom, I was confronted by a torrent of partially fermented brown fluid spurting uncontrollably from the exploded valve tap.

Keen to avert that notorious scene from “The Shining” where water cascades uncontrollably through the hotel’s corridors, I grasped numerous PET bottles and averted certain “cascading through the ceiling” disaster. Said receptacles can remain safely ensconced in a quiet corner, while I pursue some business leads and steal a march on 2014.      

  

Falling Leaves

Been a productive but tough couple of weeks, “Belgian Mix” has been satisfactorily reworked, so I’ve turned my attentions to some children’s fiction since I’m on a mission to explore additional horizons and opportunity presents. Autumn is showing visible signs of its imminent arrival and with it, renewal of the workshop roof in favour of something more substantial before renewal becomes urgent.

Other creative opportunities have presented themselves and are being pursued with renewed tenacity coupled with a sense of tentative optimism. Not exclusive to the “creative” industries but seemingly endemic is the expectation that people will supply goods and services for nothing- I’ve had several encounters of this nature recently, treating them with the contempt they deserve. I have often accepted payment in kind, or on a barter basis but refuse to indulge in the sweat shop mentality-doing so, encourages a downward spiral, rather akin to buying stolen goods and wondering why one’s home/business becomes a target for theft. Remunerate fairly and skilled people will reciprocate. 

Commissioning solely on price has major repercussions-many an “Uncle Bob” with “professional looking equipment” has shot their niece’s wedding with disastrously second-rate results, copious tears and family rifts. Sure you can get a gas combi boiler refit for £500 but don’t expect to find recompense when carbon monoxide or major explosion rips through your lives-said contractor will have saddled their horse, ridden off into the sunset without so much as a tax code, let alone public liability cover and Corgi accreditation. Never mind, household insurers are bound to be sympathetic…

For the time being I have shelved the idea of qualifying as a masseuse, since singular, professionally recognised qualifications seem rare as the proverbial rocking horse dropping and I don’t want to pursue a three year beauty therapy route, only for my extended skillset to be mooted by gender. However, opportunities can materialise unexpectedly so I’ll continue along other paths for now.

Toyed with re configuring the Univega’s front end to include an Alpina dynohub with disc mounts but the practical advantages are outweighed by unnecessary retirement of perfectly good components, while serving to increase its theft appeal. Nonetheless, I’ve invested in another Dcup lower race and Weldtite have sent me their steerer cutter, so front end surgery is definitely on the cards. Thirty thousand miles and countless shifts later it’s eight speed LX rear mech has been pensioned off in favour of this remarkably competent Microshift M45, an 8/9spd unit broadly on terms with the Japanese giant’s Alivio but a wee bit cheaper.

Ours was the long cage model for seriously wide ratios (11-34 teeth anyone) though, there’s a shorter cage sibling, which will save scarce few grams but might canter across the block fractionally faster. No surprise to see its now sporting the LX crankset, which is better finished not to mention (258g) lighter than its Alivio predecessor’s drive side alone, largely attributable to aluminium alloy rings. 

So then, we now have an eclectic ensemble of eight/nine speed mech, commanded by 8/9speed brifters, 9speed crankset, eight speed chain, cassette and fifteen year old STX front mech.  Everything was pretty much plug n’ play, save for the latter but even this this complied when fed a fresh cable and tweaked judiciously. Quintessentially crude, models of similar calibre appear pretty tolerant of mixing n’ matching and serves to scotch popular lore suggesting such configurations will never work to genuinely acceptable standards.

We’ll see how far it lags behind in another fifteen hundred miles or so, by which point I shall put the existing Sun Race and KMC consumables out to pasture, marking 108,000 miles on the tubby tourer and its continued evolution into nine speed-by default, rather than design. Well, that brings this entry to a natural conclusion-time I drafted a few pitches and copied my late father’s Open University series from VHS cassette to DVD.    

Planet Bong

Arguably the place where our political elite inhabit much of their waking hours while the greater majority of us employ a pragmatic make do n’ mend philosophy, it’s also a fascinating shop in Leamington Spa. The “usual projects” now includes redrafting of short fiction since I can’t stand essentially robust copy languishing in the hard drive. In this instance the resurrection of “Belgian Mix” http://www.63xc.com/michaels/belgianmix.htm, ring fencing a couple of hours daily with a view to satisfactory completion come September’s swansong. Mastering time management- working efficiently by another name is one of the most rewarding and essential freelancer skills. Close of last week, words and paragraphs had begun merging into a homogeneous, almost unintelligible mass, so I left a few, otherwise decent drafts marinating and headed up country to spend some time behind the lens.

Returning recharged, these and other pieces were drummed into shape and despatched to their intended recipients. Crafting pitches can prove similarly exhausting and responses, affirmative or otherwise can be several weeks hence. Glancing over at my test bench, there’s been a tsunami of enticing goodies including this beautifully crafted titanium from Torus Cycles (Justin Burls & Andy Jones).

Ours was the 27.2, 400m version, though its inline version caters for time trialists and others preferring to be poised directly over the bottom bracket shell. 264g is perhaps heavy by carbon standards but machining is exquisite and the wonder material oozes an unmistakable zing across inclement surfaces without feeling remotely whippy. Similarly £125 is hardly small change but there’s no call for planned retirement since 3AL 2.5v is particularly immune to fatigue (excluding incidence of phenomenal abuse).

Do remember those cursory licks of ti prep where it enters the seat tube, not forgetting cradle hardware. Thundering along the lanes under its spell, my serenity was rudely interrupted by a phantom squeak-something I wrongly attributed to the aluminium bolts until discovering my fixer’s crank bolt had mysteriously worked loose. Snugged tight using a leggy T handled 8mm Allen key, said fiend piped up again five miles hence. Introducing the torque wrench and a few extra nm resolved the issue.

Our climate has turned disarmingly autumnal these past few days, coinciding with the receipt of these similarly space age corrosion- inhibiting Protecht brews. The ultimate formula is an extremely powerful one that cures to a dry, clear and seemingly dirt phobic state. Supposedly acid and salt resistant, said qualities are ideally suited for mothballing decorative electroplate, anodised and polished surfaces either in storage or pretty ferrous winter bikes dripping in the stuff. BG innovations (the marque’s UK importer) are suitably tight lipped when broached about composition but suggest its ultra invasive and withstands operating temperatures of +50 degrees. Logical then that I’ve deployed ours within thin walled steel framesets, trailers, tagalongs and of course, the Ka’s notoriously grot prone regions. Initial impressions are extremely favourable, surprisingly economical too but a harsh winter will be more revealing.

Far from a watered down version, the advanced sibling is slightly waxy and arguably more versatile preserve that remains functional at 650 degrees-unsurprising perhaps given both were initially conceived for automotive audiences. Another excellent internal rust inhibitor, commendable on external plated surfaces so long as you weren’t mortified by the steady cultivation of a thin, grimy layer. Unlike Vaseline, electrical connectivity is accentuated without risking subsequent galvanic corrosion, thus ideal for dynamo connectors, computer/blinky battery terminals and similar gizmos directly in scuzzy water’s firing line. Suffice to say that VDO X1DW cadence sensor hasn’t missed a beat even fully submerged for three consecutive miles.

Maldon Shot blasting and powder coating were keen to show me their new range of powder finishes freshly imported from the states-beautiful but with some bizarre, almost mirth inducing monikers. This SE jump frame being a case in point. I’d call it lime green but Trevor tells me its actually “Shocking Yellow” applied atop a chrome effect base coat. Cost implications are around the £110 mark depending on host material and what nasties’ blasting uncovers. Remember those sound but slightly scabby “school chair” forks I’d earmarked for the Univega’s front end? Well, Trevor generously refinished them in a rich gloss black free of charge-a lovely gesture and very welcome just now.

Get some nuts, temp work and install a new bottom bracket while you’re at it!

You at the back, stop guffawing! I’m referring to the track variety and more specifically these electroplated beauties from the good folk at Edinburgh Bicycle. These are designed so their sadly defunct Cargo trailer can couple with fixed, or indeed other steeds using solid axles. Might need to revise that eighty-one inch gear though…Time will tell. Falling leaves also signalled the boxing up and return of their Audax bike-its been a very welcome, albeit temporary addition to the fleet and I’ll confess to shedding a farewell tear as I drew the gaffer tape taught around the box. However, akin to ET, it didn’t belong in my world/workshop indefinitely.

Experience suggests there’s a fine line between complimentary, dare I say comforting clutter and that countering creative flow. A healthy sense of organised chaos permeates my workspace and on a day-to day basis, this works just fine. However, a post features/testing binge calls for cathartic cleansing of papers and where appropriate, repatriation of equipment. In common with most teenagers, I had dreams of professional recognition as a successful author-name in lights stuff. Fundamentally nothing has changed and these remain a central focus or paraphrasing Tom Simpson, “Something to aim at”.

Both book projects continue with a gentle, lapping tide of progression. However, a sense of pragmatism dictates that freelancers adopt other flexible income streams. While something of a frustration, it is impossible to remain relentlessly creative, nay productive on a 24/7 basis

Many, myself included have a notion that if we’re not locked away in our studios or  ivory towers; then by definition we are not working. Creative forums can serve as useful  springboards but all too often descend into habitual and moreover dis empowering grumble fests sapping morale and moreover ingenuity. Thankfully a temp opportunity arose which helps with short- term liquidity while allowing investment in other areas.

Speaking of which, I’ve discovered Green Oil can supply their chain degreaser in workshop quantities (forms the basis of their miraculous citrus based bike wash when diluted) so I’ll be investing in some. They’ve also sent some second generation “White” clean lube. Devoid of petrochemicals, the original was good (at least while it lasted-we were averaging a mere forty road miles per application) so it’ll be interesting to see how the new formula compares.  

Dressed in black patent leather, I feel so much better…as the weather starts becoming more inclement and nightfall descends around 19.30, I’ve resurrected these Bontrager twin bolt commu-tour types. Low “ deft lick of the Jey cloth” maintenance, grippy soles and neutral colours compliment both ends of the wardrobe, although their footbeds were firmly in wallpaper stripping territory given a few season’s service! A fresh set of cleats completes the makeover and the design is just narrow enough to accommodate traditional overshoes should things turn decidedly damp…Shame they’re no longer current-although online retailers seem to have healthy stocks at generous discounts…

A penny shy of £70 this rather fetching Dhb EQ 2.5 jacket continues my black theme. It’s an affordable weatherproof model with a sportier than average, tailored cut that still entertains the time honoured base layer and race jersey combo. Red/black or grey/green are the similarly subtle alternatives, which may not be to everyone’s taste in murky weather and a few moonlit miles saw me don a Sam Browne belt or reflective tabard for enhanced road presence. On the flip side, the darker colours and Teflon coating slows the advance of grimy patinas in between low temperature machine washes.

Moisture management is pretty much on par with competitor models, keeping pace with my own at steady cadences and to around 20mph. Upping the tempo closer to chain gang speeds sees it struggle, especially when the mercury creeps into double figures but its available in gender specific cuts and seems ideally suited to winter proper (November-March).

 Much is made of China's status as an economic powerhouse and its implications for the West. Schools in particular have been quick to leap on a dogmatic bandwagon of teaching Mandarin. However, thanks to an ageing population and one child policy, the numbers of economically active adults fuelling its corporate engine will be greatly reduced with crippling implications.

Arguably next in line are India and Brazil, so Punjabi or Portuguese might be more prudent. Some within the cycle industry are suggesting the rising costs of imports from the Far East may be fuelling a slow but steady return to large- scale domestic production of lightweight frames…

Right, I’ll leave you all to ponder this while I whip out my big 13-½ inch (33.5cm) Lezyne CNC rod and replace the Univega’s cartridge bottom bracket. 

Perched Pragmatically

Had an email chat with Ryton on Dunsmore based Lee Cooper regarding a few projects and decided to solicit his advice concerning the Holdsworth’s damaged bottom bracket shell. Its cause remains a mystery but will involve cutting out the original and replacing it with something of equivalent, period sensitive quality. Then of course, “Ninja blue” will need fresh livery. On various occasions I’ve explored the notion of something more radical- bottle bosses, my name emblazoned along the down tube in tasteful italics etc but this is unnecessary and structurally invasive indulgence-not that I could be accused of being a purist given its overtly contemporary flavour. The obvious plan of action is to leave the torchmanship to Lee and the paint to Maldon Shot blasting & Powder Coating.

Speaking of which, Graham and the boys managed to slip the tune up stand and carrier through last week, giving them a much cheerier red rebirth. If you want something done, give it to busy folk. Embracing this mantra on an a pragmatic level has seen me take the cash flow demon by the horns and doing some seasonal shift work in local factories. This isn’t the most obvious source of inspiration and I’d be the first to admit coming home feeling pretty exhausted physically but having left my brain very much in neutral, find creativity positively flows for a couple of hours hence. Breaks between the days have also seen a spike in focus/productivity words and pictures-wise.  So long as I’ve reached the first, preferably second draft stage during the week, weekends can prove incredibly fertile ground creatively-principally because my mind is relaxed

Serendipity is another of my buzzwords and this came in the form of a cycle event. I’d decided to leave the motorway and do a quick sweep by the supermarket when a procession of riders, some clearly seasoned others distinctly green whizzed, or in some cases wheezed past. These became less bunched with time and I swapped shopping bags for CSC camera with 50-180mm lens, clicking away from a safe distance so as not to attract unwelcome attraction. Further investigation suggested it was in aid of little haven’s children’s hospice-a worthwhile cause if ever there was one.

So many organisations need support in some way or other, although I always fear public spiritedness is being exploited to the advantage of local and moreover central government who may cut existing funding or otherwise shirk their obligations. 

Leather has rocketed back into vogue in recent years and the economics of supply and demand are beginning to swing in the consumer’s favour as more brands enter the market. Harrogate touring maestros Spa cycles have done precisely this, launching their own range of saddles and luggage. The Aire (pictured) is a narrow, racing design made from untreated Australian cowhide that measures 148mm at its widest point, thus music to my sit bones. Untreated finishes aren’t simply an exercise in cost cutting either, although will require more frequent feeding to keep it supple and the elements firmly at bay-most notably during the bedding in period, which is around the 600 mile (800 km) mark.

Obviously, this can be accelerated with judicious application of neats foot oil to the underside, coupled with weekly treatments of proofide to the top (dropping to one every month/six weeks having completed the quoted milestone so as not to encourage premature wear). Mirror polished electroplated Cro-moly rails add to the timeless feel and dare I say the overall 590g girth. Then again at £45, complete with tensioning spanner to keep the hide in best fettle, its unbelievably good value for money.  Now, in amongst this excitement I’ve bathroom and central heating boiler refits to project manage along with road testing this rather fetching Audax bike so you’ll have to excuse me …

  

Meandering through the monsoon: Helmet cams, Secret compounds & portable detonators…

Rain has remained a consistent metaphor for my somewhat downbeat mood these past few weeks but maybe it’s just a question of skies being darkest before dawn. A publisher popped up from behind the proverbial parapet keen for the book project to take off, subject to contact. Heartening though this is, congratulatory backslapping does not a book write. Sat under the shade of Uncle Benny’s Veranda, guzzling diesel strength coffee, we happened upon a light bulb cash-flow solving moment. I have a long held fascination for pattern parts, specifically electronics and am seriously looking into importing some for commercial purposes…speaking of electricals, I’ve been mightily impressed by the original Go-Pro Hero HD helmet cam.

Arguably superseded by its MKII sibling, build and image quality remain top notch, especially in 1280x960 mode thanks to a wide-angle f2.8 lens. Documentary filmmaking prowess aside, its had a very positive effect upon driver etiquette. All but the most ignorant/unlicensed/uninsured (and therefore untouchable) overtook and approached with greater courtesy. That said, it’s widely acknowledged that in tense inner city neighbourhoods, violent conflict can be sparked simply by a motor/cyclist making greater progress through stationary traffic, let alone potentially criminal driver behaviours being recorded. Generally user-friendly, it requires several trial runs for intuitive function and consequently, I lost some potentially hilarious footage on those initial outings. Similarly, it’s a little hefty worn atop a lightweight road lid longer than ninety minutes, so I’m eager to get hold of the recently launched handlebar mount.

Our celebrity culture isn’t a new phenomenon, people see a camera and either call the authorities, or loose all inhibitions. Two teenagers approaching me couldn’t have drawn more attention to themselves if they’d sported colossal white beards and red tunics. Even those who wouldn’t so much as manage a grunt couldn’t resist a breezy holler and one chap even indulged in a bit of ad-hoc business promotion (didn’t have the heart to tell him I’d got the weather and therefore, soundproof backing in situ!).

Extensive praying to the god of blowouts brought some lovely goodies. These Panaracer Ribmo arrived for the Univega courtesy of their UK importer (www.zyro.co.uk). Three hundred miles or so through flooded roads has left a very positive impression, although their profiles are closer to 1.6 rather than 1.75 inches as denoted on their sidewalls. This hasn’t negatively affected performance, especially cantering across metalled road but called for tyre levers when persuading their folding versions aboard common or garden cross country mtb rims. In the wake of this latest wave of terrorist paranoia, perhaps this beautifully executed Lezyne micro floor drive pump could be mistaken for a plastics explosives detonator when cadging a lift on the bottle bosses and perhaps best stowed away in the panniers. Subversive humour aside, its mightily efficient to a genuine 120psi, which is sufficient for all bar top-flight tubulars. However, care must be taken to avoid accidentally triggering the bleed valve when disconnecting the hose.

A fresh set of fetching Fibrax gear cables have brought renewed vigour to the tubby tourer’s shifting and I’ve resuscitated its cheap but oh so cheerful blinky whose switch had succumbed to the recent Bollywood monsoon conditions. Dismantled and left to dry at room temperature, I administered a slathering of Vaseline to the internals and repaired a hairline crack where seal and lens meet using Effetto Mariposa Carbo Grip. Essentially, it’s a sophisticated silicone resin assembly spray, designed for the modern, composite age but works a treat on a wealth of other materials/contexts including tri-bars, handlebar grips, bottle/carrier and fender mounts 

Elsewhere, The Teenage Dream was roused from hibernation with a set of these Fibrax Xtreme weather pads and I took this opportunity for a quick tyre swap in favour of those 25mm Freedom thick slicks-pretty much filling clearances to capacity while the pads stopping prowess saw me sit up and take notice. Perfect for winter trainers, I’d like to put their cantilever versions to the test on a laden tourer-just by way of comparison and mountain bikers will be interested to hear they’re also available in a V brake compatible format. Clever self-cleansing channelling uses rainfall to prevent muck/grit accumulating and scouring sidewalls-great news for less vigilant riders but those with swanky composite hoops will need to look elsewhere. Loquacious probing couldn’t reveal anything of their exact composition-apparently it’s a trade secret and native to Wales….

 

Facts & Figures

A break in the weather has allowed intensive testing of those Vaude Birch three quarter length pants and in the main I’m mightily impressed not least by their cut, style and practicality. The fabric is also impregnated with a (factor 50) sunscreen designed to protect rider and garment from the undesirable side- effects of UV rays but removable OEM inserts were a distinct disappointment, showing a marked tendency for bunching up uncomfortably within a matter of miles-not what I’d expect at this end of the market. Mercifully, substituting them for stand-alone eight panel designs has allowed me to churn along in serene comfort for several consecutive hours. Our metallic versions looked razor sharp with the Bontrager jacket but they’re also available in “Shadow” or black and in a women specific design as appropriate.
Inspecting the Univega’s heavy duty Gusset GS 8 chain using the Freedom Sports (KMC) digital gauge gave a reading of 0.65, indicating late middle age and like- for- like replacement before 0.80 signals pension day or worse still, cassette and chain-ring cannibalism. Despite constant exposure to the elements, there’s been no hint of corrosion in the last three thousand miles (twelve hundred above average), which I attribute to greater girth and a staple diet of self-cleansing, wax type lubes.

Ison distribution, Gusset’s UK importer advises they are awaiting a fresh consignment so a chance conversation with another distributor has seen this nickel plated Sun Race flutter through my letterbox. I’ve been seriously impressed by the emergent marques’ higher end road and mountain bike drivetrains which are easily a match for 105/LX only with smaller price-tags so it’ll be interesting to see how the chain performs over the coming six months.
At face value, there’s little distinguishing the Sun Race from a glut of similar nickel-plated eight-speed designs-aside from the side-plates. 200kg per foot is pretty much on par with Shimano’s venerable PC68 and our 116 ink sample proved tailor made for the Univega’s gear ratios-straight from the packet. This made a nice change and in the interests of quitting while ahead, I employed the magic link. I’ve traditionally shyed away from these in the interests of outright durability but this particular design seems reassuringly hardy. Nonetheless, being a road model serving an a’la Carte groupset, I’ve cut a fresh set of precautionary spare links from a partially cannibalised Sachs languishing in my toolbox…

I’ve also a tendency to run new chains dressed only in the protective factory lube for a week or so before introducing something more colloquial. However, given the cassette was already clogging with the soft residue of previously applied wax, a powerful degreaser and comb through seemed the best medicine. Some folk swear by steam cleaning chains, cassettes and even rings over a hot stove. This particular lesson in home economics involves bringing a six-inch pan of water to the boil before introducing chain and a dishwasher tablet. Simmer on a medium heat for twenty minutes before performing several clean water rinses. Allow to boil completely dry, cool at room temperature before refitting and garnishing with your preferred tipple.
That said; frugality can be stretched beyond the point of practicality. Yes, cheap washing powder and redundant toothbrushes remove corrosion/tarnish from polished and plated surfaces with consummate ease but other homely remedies are firmly tongue in cheek. Several years ago, I was doing some income recovery/credit control for a classic motorcycle/salvage yard when a man in his late sixties drew up, remarking that his BSA was suffering from an unexplained misfire. Remaining straight faced, I quipped “Flush it through with cold black tea Sir”. After a brief, convivial exchange, he was gone and I attended to a pile of outstanding invoices. Two weeks later he returned, extolling the virtues of said cold tea flush! My jaw dropped and recoiled cartoon fashion-I never for one moment thought he’d be so literal in his interpretation.

The F in freelance all too frequently stands for frustration. Watched phones never ring and email replies never materialise-or so it seems but I returned from a ride to discover an interested small-scale publisher had been in contact. Naturally, once the excitement had stabilised, I sounded a warm but cautious welcome since the devil lives in the finer details and self-congratulatory/complacent attitudes are woefully misplaced. That’s all for now folks, I’m off to interview Gary Rothera and Joshua’s just commandeered my hounds tooth winter cap!